Lost Time

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I seem to have lost some time. Actually, quite a bit of time. Almost a week, it appears.

For all three people that read this blog, you may have noticed that it wasn't in the usual place last week. I only realized that after I received a very nice email from an esteemed reader saying that he hoped I had a very nice holiday and was looking forward the next article - soon.

I was puzzled by this email at first, because I was sure that I put my last piece into the latest edition of the blog. I went through my file and sure enough, there it was. Then I looked at the date on the article and checked it against my phone.

Oops.

Adrenaline Rush

You know, the adrenaline rush you get from a rollercoaster or white water rafting or some such activity is great. The racing heart, the sharpening of all your senses and the sheer exhilaration of the moment makes you feel alive in the best sense of the word.

The rush you get from a near miss in real life, well, that's a bit different. The same physical and chemical reaction takes place, but it's not so much exhilaration, at least in my experience. It's more of a thankfulness of surviving.

Let me explain.

Decisions

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There are times in everyone's life that you are required to make decisions. I'm not talking about the everyday decisions, I'm talking about some big decisions, life-changing decisions. Something that rests on that singular moment where it either goes really, really well or spectacularly bad.

This is one of those times.

Darth, Dads and Daughters

When I was a kid and watching Stars Wars for the first time, Darth Vader was the epitome of the Evil Bad Guy. Even after the twenty-seventh viewing, my opinion was unchanged – Darth was a bad dude and deserved everything he got.

Then came the second movie of the series and the bombshell near the end of the film that Darth was actually Luke’s real father! The explosive gasp in the theater almost blew the exit doors off their hinges. Gasp, not gas, despite the theater being filled to capacity with 15- to 18-year-olds. The last shocker was finding out the Leia and Luke were twins, making Darth Vader the father of twins. I don't know how I made it through the next two years until the third film.

I missed...

Well, crap.

I missed a day somewhere and am still trying to find it. I'll be back Friday or Saturday (unless it's one of those days that have gone missing...)

Passwords

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You know, as a kid, I always wanted to be a spy or special agent, with all the cool gadgets, hidden headquarters and secret passwords. Especially secret passwords.

Now that I'm all grown up - at least physically - I still want the cool gadgets and a hidden HQ (where I can sit in peace and quiet once in a while).

Passwords, though? Not so much…

Pranks

People sometimes wonder where I got my sense of humour from. Actually, people sometimes just wonder about me in general. Oh well.

I’m going to come right and say it’s all my parents’ fault. Mostly my dad’s to be honest.  He’s 77 years old this year, going on twelve. He’ll still deny stealing a fresh baked cookie, even when he has chocolate on his face and crumbs on his shirt. That’s consistency!

From my Mom, I received the gift of appreciating the humour in family situations. Many a day went by when I’d find Mom sitting in the kitchen or living room, giggling quietly to herself because the dog wore his food bowl as a hat or the cat tried to catch a butterfly through a screen window. Maybe it was just from watching us kids get ready for school. 

No Gun Hunting

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Back in my traveling days, I was lucky enough to spend some time in New Zealand. It was an era where you could actually get around the country by hitchhiking, without fear of ending up as fodder for a horror film.

My buddy Murray and I were heading south to Auckland to meet up with our friend Cliff. We were at a crossroads when a small car slowed down to pick us up. It was a Government of New Zealand vehicle and the driver looked us over, measuring and weighing the options, while Mur and I tried to look as innocent and trustworthy as possible.

Quit laughing - we could pull it off back then.

Recovery

I need a nap. It's not because I've had the requisite 3.7 pounds of turkey, with all the sides: mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes with marshmallows on top, several vegetables of various colours and shapes and as much dessert as I could fit in afterwards.

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It's also not because I had to stay up until 3:00 am to put together a doll house or tricycle - the kids are all old enough to want smartphones and money now, which has saved me a lot of grief over the last few years…besides, my darling wife and I woke up well before the kids on Christmas Day. Go figure.

No, I think I need to have a snooze to try and rest up from all the aftershocks of this Christmas/New Year season. Being an independent contractor means having to take as many jobs as possible. If you don't, then one day you'll finish up a project and realize there will be too much month at the end of the money, so I was working until the very last minute.

Men and Women Explained

Today we talk about the differences between Man and Woman. It's the start of a new year and we should try to set some ground rules and expectations. Besides, my kids want me to lay off them for a while.

Men are fascinated by big explosions, shiny things and bodily functions that involve any kind of gas. We (men) are content to accept things the way they are and do not have to dig for a deeper truth in everything we see. 

Women seem to need to dig down, get every detail, significant or not. Men already have all the info they need to make a decision. There is a simplicity to our methods that works very well. We get enough data to make a decision and go with it. We don't have to obsess over a lot of detail.