The Beauty of a Hippie Van

My youngest and I were stopped at a four-way stop when a lime green VW camper van stopped across the intersection. It was in pretty good shape, well-kept and shiny, with the silver hubcaps and white tire rims contrasting nicely.

My youngest said, "Hey, there's a hippie van. Cool! That looks great, I'd love to have one of those…" The driver didn't dispel the myth, having a very full beard and multi-coloured toque on. I didn't know that my son actually knew what a hippie was.

I started to laugh. My buddy, Murray, had owned one when we were in High School together, about five years ago or so.

"Sure," I said "if you like having your shins as an integral part of the crash prevention system."

"What do you mean?" my son asked. "Well, there is only a skin of sheet metal between your lower legs and the bumper of the van. So, if you hit anything straight on, your shins help reinforce the bumper."

He looked at me with disbelief in his eyes, which isn't all that unusual. All my kids look at me like that at least once a day. Can't understand why.

The adventures Murray and I had in the past started to come to mind and I started to tell my son a few of them. The fact that you pretty much have to drop the engine out of the van to change the oil and the top speed going up a hill was only a brisk walking pace for a septuagenarian got another skeptical glance.

I told him of the time Murray and I and two other friends were heading up a switchback road to a ski hill. We were about halfway up and the engine was struggling a bit, so two of us slid the side door open and hanging on to the seatbelt straps (safety first!), we each put a leg out and kicked along the road, treating the van much like a big, orange skateboard that had sides and a roof. 

We were pretty competitive with the other skateboards on the road and actually Murray said we were helping a bit. As we rounded the next corner, the slush and snow from the road started flying into the van, landing in a pile at the backseat. Not one to miss an opportunity, we promptly made snowballs and did some target practice with the trees along side of the road.

What can I say, we were multi-taskers even then.

Another time, Murray decided it was a good day to go cross country skiing, so he woke me up far too early and we headed out to the mountains. It was only -30 degrees (really!) so Murray decided to fire up the heater. VW vans have a gasoline heater for the cabin area. You'd think it would get pretty toasty.

Not so much. We made the trip to the ski area with a down sleeping bag over our legs to stave off frostbite and kept pretty warm by scraping the inside of the front windshield continuously so we could see the road. Come summer time though, that heater worked like a dream!

I had my son laughing pretty hard by the time we got home. With all the quirks, the poor performance, the crappy gas mileage and downright pain in the backside problems with those vans, I finally had him convinced.

As soon as he can make enough money, I think he's going to buy one. I am so looking forward to the first road trip!