Plumbing Season

It’s plumbing season in the house these days. Not that I really need a plumbing season per se, it’s just that I finally got down to the plumbing jobs on my “To Do” list.

Usually I try to start plumbing jobs when it’s a bit warmer – say, July. There are a few good reasons for this. My tools from the garage aren’t so cold that they stick to my skin. I don’t have to get parka and boots on to get the tools from the garage. The family’s hair doesn’t freeze on the walk home from the local swimming pool, where they’ve had to go for their showers.

It’s not like I plan to have the water off for any length of time. It’s not like I don’t plan, either, despite what you may have heard. I always make a plan when starting projects – it just doesn’t survive first contact with the pipes...

My first real plumbing job started at the first house my darling wife and I bought. The kitchen tap was leaking a lot so we bought a new one. I cleared out the cabinet under the sink, and lay down to see how things were connected. This is at 9 o’clock in the morning.

Now I know why plumbers charge what they do. Did you know that the ledge of the cabinet is generally four inches above the floor of the kitchen? And did you also know that the depth of the cabinet is just deep enough that when you lie down in said cabinet, the (sharp) edge of the cabinet lines up perfectly with your kidneys?

So I started: under the sink to find no sign of a shut-off valve. No matter, start by cutting the copper pipes. Promptly break the pipe cutter. Head to the hardware store to buy a new one and be convinced that shut-off valves are a good thing. Get home, cut the pipes and put in the valves, run out of Teflon tape. Head to hardware store, get more tape and head back. Finish the valves and start on the tap. Can’t get the locknut off the tap. Head to the hardware store and plead for help. Grab a nifty new tool and back to the house. New tool works great, old tap off, new tap on, new shut-off valves turned on, no leaks!

Elapsed time: 8 hours.

Another project was fixing a leaky tap in the downstairs shower. This really shouldn’t take too long, probably just a washer. Turn off the house supply (no shut-off valves again, darn!) and take apart the tap. No washers to be found, but it had tiny springs in the housing that were the perfect size to fit through the drain holes in the shower. Off to the Plumbing supply store, tell the gent what I had and struggled to keep up as he told me how to fix the tap, all the while loading up with many itty-bitty parts.

Back at home, take the tap apart and find out that basement showers are really the lowest point in the house. Drying myself off, I covered the drain with my foot, opened up all the little parts and proceeded to reassemble the tap. Amazingly, all the parts fit and the tap doesn’t leak anymore. Elapsed time: 2 hours. See, I can learn new things.

The best fix I ever accomplished occurred a couple of months ago. There was water in the laundry room in the basement. Looking at the main drain, I remembered the shower repair and looked up to see where the leak was. We traced it to the drain under the kitchen sink, where a joint had broken. Leaping into action, I quickly ran to the phone, looked up a local plumber and called him over. Elapsed time for the repair: 30 minutes and ninety bucks.

Worth every penny.